Reading:  from “Designing and Implementing a ‘Small Group Ministry’ Focus for Your Congregation”  by the Rev. Glenn H. Turner,  Small Group Ministry Consultant.

     In the past few years, the concept of a church ministry based on relationally-oriented small groups has captured the imaginations of Unitarian Universalists across North America.  We are more aware of the hunger, not just with UUs, but with people across the continent, for intimacy and spiritual growth.  We live in a time when real participation and involvement in groups and civic organizations is markedly shrinking.  Too often, what passes for “individualism” is a withdrawal from the institutions which have long helped to carry and sustain our communal values.

     Unitarian Universalism has been no less affected by the changed culture.  Our growth has stagnated relative to the general population.  It takes all the running we can do to stay in the same place.  And, the kind of running we do, in trying to channel people onto committees to keep the church floating, too often leads to burnout and disillusion.  It does not suffice to produce a new fund-raising technique or handbook on how to run a board meeting when we need first to address the basic spiritual and intimacy needs of our members!  Hence the rising interest in “small group ministry.”

     The Small Group Ministry program was fashioned after models in mainstream and evangelical branches of Protestantism, models from UU congregations like those in Brewster, Massachusetts and Tulsa, Oklahoma, some of the more relationally oriented programs like “Building Your Own Theology” and “Cakes for the Queen of Heaven” and “Evensong”, and models like AA and other 12 step groups which have helped so many people in coping with their day to day struggles.  And we can now look at congregations in Augusta and Yarmouth, Maine, in Arlington, Virginia, and London, Ontario, and others which have a significant number of ongoing small groups revitalizing their congregations.

     My own enthusiasm for Small Group Ministry lies in the fact that it can be shaped and developed by any one of our congregations.  There is no patent on the process.  In fact, I think that the success of Small Group Ministry will be in direct proportion to how much each church takes ownership of the process.

Sermon:
     I’m excited!  I’m excited about the possibilities that Small Group Ministry brings to our congregation.  In particular, the program offers expanded opportunities for community and for spiritual growth.
 In my experience, many people seek out religious communities in a quest to meet two fundamental human needs:  ultimacy and intimacy.  People come to our churches to be lifted out of the ordinary, to be drawn up from the mundane, and to seek relief (preferably in an interactive way) from the omnipresent materialism of our culture.  That’s the quest for ultimacy: a sense of connecting with and belonging to something larger than ourselves, as well as getting in touch with those deepest inner parts of ourselves.

     People, living in our society of frequent relocations and diminished family support, come to our churches to find friends, community, “a place where everybody knows your name.”  That’s the quest for intimacy: relationships characterized by a deep level of sharing and mutual respect and understanding.
 Small-group organization, which I will describe later in more detail, is designed to meet both these fundamental needs in ways that our Sunday services, coffee hours, committee meetings, and other gatherings cannot.  Sunday services are too large to allow for much meaningful personal interaction.  Committee meetings are often too task-oriented to lend themselves to a spiritual or personal focus.  And in the chaos of Sunday coffee hour, it’s difficult to get beyond fairly superficial chit chat.

     Church experts have been saying for years that the most important factor determining whether newcomers to a congregation will stay is whether or not they link up with some small relational group.  Now, the fact that this congregation is thriving, and includes many people who have been around for several years, suggests that there must be such groups already in existence here.  And that is indeed true.

     Some of the small, relational groups we already have include the choir, the UU Christians,  and several book discussion groups.  Several of our committees, in spite of their task orientation, also serve as relational groups.  I think particularly of the Sunday Services, Fellowship Relations, and Religious Education committees.  I am sure there are others as well.  Then there are the more temporary opportunities for small group sharing, such as Adult Religious Education classes and Dinner Club.

     I want to make it very clear that the Small Group Ministry program is not meant to replace all those other naturally-occurring groups.  It is meant to expand the opportunities for small group experience, by intentionally providing those opportunities for every member and friend who wants them.

     I just finished facilitating two Adult Religious Education programs this past week: Building Your Own Theology and Writing Your Spiritual Autobiography.  And let me tell you, that’s the part of my ministry that I find the most enriching and spiritually nourishing.  The richness and depth of the sharing in those classes has truly been a gift for me, and I think for many of the other participants as well.  It is a desire to share the wealth of that experience that motivates my effort to get the Small Group Ministry program under way.

     As a way of summing up the potential value of the program, let me paraphrase from a publication of the Center for Community Values:
 

  Small groups establish and nurture themselves in their own
  beloved community.  They provide an opportunity for group
  members to build strong relationships with each other and
  with the larger organization of which the small group is a part.

  Small groups encourage people to talk, learn, work and play
  together over time.  Members may tell their life stories, offer
  support, and engage in work to serve the larger community.
  Groups offer expanding opportunities for growth, caring and
  connection within a congregation.  Groups offer caring
  affiliative networks, mutual responsibility, leadership
  opportunities, and a way for people to build and strengthen
  their communities.

  In groups, people experience a relational individuality which
  affirms the inherent worth and dignity of every person.  People
  experience themselves and each other as part of the interdependent
  web of existence of which we are all a part.  Together, people
  establish communities that embody the values of justice,
  democracy and human dignity and encourage one another to
spiritual growth.  Each person is treated equitably.
  Each has a voice and is heard.  And each person is respected
  for her or his own intrinsic humanity.

     And so the small group concept is highly compatible with our Unitarian Universalist principles, and with our Fellowship’s mission to inspire and empower individuals to live out their values and principles in community.
 Now that I’ve gone on at some length about why I’m excited about Small Group Ministry, I’d like to take some time to say what the program entails.  Each group will consist of six to twelve people.  We’ll be aiming initially for groups of about ten.  Groups will meet regularly, probably either once or twice a month, in someone’s home if possible, here at the Fellowship if necessary.  Each group will be led by a facilitator, who will also be a full participant in the group.

     The real core of the program is the regular group meeting, which has a standard format, but with variable content.  Each session begins with some opening words to help get the group centered.  The facilitator may read them, or may ask another member to do so.  Next comes a check-in or sharing.  Each group will develop its own way of handling this.  It may be just a chance for each member to note their current physical, mental or emotional state.  Or it might take the form of sharing joys and sorrows since the previous meeting.

     The real meat of each session will generally be focused around a particular topic.  A paragraph or two lays out the topic and poses some questions designed to elicit thoughtful participation and significant reflection.  Usually each member would have a chance to share their reflections, uninterrupted, with open discussion following the initial round of sharings.  Again, however, the specific format of this segment can be shaped by the group to fit its needs.

     Following the main discussion of the session, there is an opportunity for feedback about the session, in the form of “likes and wishes.”  That is, members are invited to comment on things they liked about the session, and any ways in which they wish things would be handled differently. Finally, there are closing words that bring the formal session to an end.

     A session would normally last for one-and-a-half to two hours (again, that’s up to the will of the group).  As for session topics, the sky’s the limit.  We will start with a small library of sessions.  I will be developing more sessions as we go along, and groups will also be encouraged to develop sessions of their own that can be added to the library.  Facilitators and their groups can then decide from week to week what topics to do.

     Some possible topics are: sharing our religious histories; understandings and experience of worship; living simply; the nature and importance of service to the community; poetry; living and dying; parents; prayer; sacred places; and spiritual growth and experience.  And that just scratches the surface.

     I would like to mention a couple of additional features of the Small Group Ministry program.  One is that each group is asked to formulate a group covenant, which is simply a written account of how the group wishes to be with one another.  It may address issues of attendance, punctuality, respectful listening, decision-making processes, or anything else that the group considers important.  The covenant might be the topic for the third or fourth session, once members have started getting to know one another.

     Another feature of the program is a built-in service component.  Each group is expected to take on some sort of service project each year, for the benefit of either the Fellowship, or of the larger community.  One reason for this is to help maintain the identity of the group as a part of the larger Fellowship community, as part of the shared ministry of the Fellowship.

     Finally, each group is asked to have at least one empty chair to symbolize those not yet part of a group, and our openness to make a place for them.

     We’ve looked now at the “why” and the “what” of Small Group Ministry.  Let’s get to the “how”.  Planning for the program has been going on for some months now.  You may have seen notices in the past couple of newsletters.  The Board and the Committee Council have each experienced a sample session.  And now the time has come to begin signing up for groups.  Registration forms are available in the Fellowship office.

    Registration for the first set of groups will stay open until January 13, at which point groups will be formed based on mutual availability.  First sessions should happen during the second half of January or the first half of February.  After that time, registration will continue, and will be dealt with on a case by case basis, either adding to existing groups or creating new ones
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     I’d like to close with the following from Jack Kornfield:
 

  The things that matter most in our lives are not fantastic or grand.
  They are the moments when we touch one another,
  when we are there in the most attentive or caring way.
  This simple and profound intimacy is the love that we all long for,
  These moments of touching and being touched can become a
  foundation for a path with a heart, and they take place in the
  most immediate and direct way.
  Mother Theresa put it like this: “In this life we cannot do great things.
  We can only do small things with great love.”